Strange Nikolai

not a stormtrooper

Archive for the tag “kermit”

Goldblumy

As in Jeff Goldblum. By adjective-ised up. But Goldblumy looks a bit like Corblimey which apparently originated from God Blind Me, which looks even more like Goldblumy. Which proves that Jeff Goldblum is actually a blind priest. Like Stevie Wonder.

So I’ve been told a few times over the past month, by random people who don’t know each other, that I look like Jeff Goldblum. More specifically Jeff Goldblum in the movies The Fly and Jurassic Park. His name is surprisingly hard to type so I’m just going to call him JG from now on, or Goldy, or the Jeffster, wasn’t the band on Chuck called Jeffster ? (convenient link – yes it was! Thanks Zemanta!) Do you even know what I’m talking about? Chuck. It’s a TV show about a nerd. Except in my terms he’s probably more of a geek than a nerd. But it’s America, y’know, they do things different (read “stupid”).

That’s two pics of JG btw, not a side by side comparison jobbie of me and him.

Personally I think the only similarities are that we’re both tall, wear glasses, have big noses, slightly olive skin, practically identical hair (except I can’t grow sideburns – fuck, I’d love some sideburns like that. That’s the only reason I put that second pic in. I have sideburn envy. They’re not even particularly impressive sideburns – just simple, stylish, sideburns. Want. Stupid facial hair. In other news, I just bought a new stubble trimmer. It’s Vidal Sassoon. OOOoooOOO! $39.99 from Farmers – down from $79.99. If you don’t know what Farmers is, nevermind. Anyway, back to the comparison…), my jawline, ears and mouth look pretty much exactly like that left pic, and our eyes are the same shape and colour. But apart from that…. hang on, we DO look alike!!!11!1!

No we don’t. Just cos all the bits look the same (wow that managed to sound rude – my bits look like JG’s) doesn’t mean I’m a JG doppleganger. I’m not even Jewish. And I can’t do a convincing american accent. And the only impression I can do is kermit. I like JG’s hand gestures – I might work on that…

Though when I fell off a cliff and died last year the twitscape (and some media – including Channel 9 news in Australia. Stupid aussies) reported that it was him. Stupid Goldblum. Stealing my death thunder. Death Thunder is my new band name. On Lego Rock Band. Which I bought on the weekend but haven’t played yet cos I was too busy doing other stuff. So I don’t even know if you get to set up your own name. But I hope you do.

Fuck, now you know where I live. DAMMIT. Or where I don’t live, I suppose…

Strangely Nikolai

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